Spring forward

After an exhausting week, it's nice to have spring just around the corner as daylight savings start today!

Vern was away for three days, the children and I weren't without our crazy moments, and a few things (the saner ones) afoot with them...

Baby Kait (almost overnight!) finally sprouted her first tooth. She's otherwise occupied with crawling here and there!

Ben had gone ahead to invite his classmates to his party!

"Party, what party?" I had to ask him, since his birthday isn't until May.

"The one you're going to send cards to tell everyone to come," he shot back without missing a beat!

"Erm... (see how carefully this mom treads)... shouldn't we discuss it first?"

"I am discussing it with you NOW..."!

Talk about growing up too fast too soon!

And moving along with a book report due after next weekend, Jon is trying to hurry up and finish reading the book puh-lease -- I begged him oh-so-politely, and I'm the more anxious one as always! So that he can go on to work on the report, and hopefully it'll be one less thing to worry about, what with three tests coming up that same week! This week, the teacher had sprung a surprise Math test on the class. Only, Jon preferred to call it "a SECRET test... because surprises are meant to be nice!"?!

But nice or not nice, fair or not fair, how do you encourage children who'd rather be laidback about homework, (and honestly, I'm trying not to dread it), that keeping up with it day by day is the only way forward? It is (time and again) driving me quite crazy!

Face the music

Boys and girls getting in step and grooving to Michael Jackson's "Thriller"...

It's the highlight from more than just square and line dancing going on during P.E and music for the second winter now!

How cool is that? It had Jon going to YouTube for the video clips, just so he could practise the moves every chance he got, before the performance in front of us parents! And he's still doing it, especially when he can catch a glimpse of himself in the mirror or some window!

If only he can be as thrilled over his homework, no doubt there's more to do, besides that chess takes up a lot of time and he's excited over his progress there, and we are for him, too. But schoolwork has to come first, and by now, I should not have to call him till the cows come home every day to sit down and get it done, or face the music!

Of course, such 'archaic' phrases just get blank stares from him, as if I hail from another planet... duh... But if you know what I mean that this mom only has so much patience.

Like a stress reliever, I do the Bunny Hop, a simpler dance the school taught to the younger children, including Ben. Picture me doing it with him, his hands on my hip, and me carrying Kait at the same time:

Right, right...
left, left...
jump forward, jump backward...
one, two three! (hop three times)

No, I'd better not jump too high, but yes, it's great for bringing on the giggles and chuckles! You must try it, too!

Facing the world...
Here I am still just working on the basics, asking the boys to be responsible for their own things, but I realise not that I didn't before, that the real world we live in does not wait for them to grasp those first before tossing challenges across their paths.

Do our children know how to react when they are picked on? Or when other children rope them in to bend the rules? It is staggering that the very young are already so streetwise.

However, mine don't always know how to respond or give the "right" answer we expect of them. And not that they can't be the instigators, but every time something like this happens, it prompts us to do what we can to teach and pray for our little ones to have the values we believe in. Easier said than done, but hopefully that'll equip them to face such situations.

From leaves to snow

Each day rolls so quickly into the next, the crisp autumn air has given way to the colder weather now.

And before the last leaves have fallen, the first snow has arrived!

Below: Same spot last month...
... when the leaves were falling like crazy, and Vern, with a little help from the boys, had raked them into this big heap!

And yes, this is the kind of "work" Jon's happy to be buried in!

Jon's style -- to do as little as possible in the looooooongest time, is the opposite of mine. So you can imagine the power struggles between us, whenever he drags his feet with even the simplest homework! *sigh*

But this is one of those things, like the other familiar stuff that if he and Ben can just do it without having to put up a fight first, it'll reduce everyone's stress trying to get our act together every day.

Also, because at 3+ months old, Kait is still not napping well, crying to be carried the moment I lay her down, and come bedtime, hasn't stopped me guessing if the last feed will really be the one that'll give us that much coveted one stretch of 3h sleep.

Very pooped, and I may not figure this baby sleep thing out (*waaaaaah!!!*), but do look forward to when these "dark(er)" nights and days will pass! Meanwhile, trying not to overwhelm myself by keeping to the basics more than ever now.

My latest tools of the trade aka sanity aids include:

- A baby carrier...
A lookalike of the ergo one, but at a third of the price, it's not bad. It spreads out the weight better than the sling, and still frees my hands for quick chores and errands, carrying Kait around. I call her my lil 'Roo now!

- Reward charts...
For lack of a better idea, and do share if you have alternatives, we're back to using these to encourage Jon and Ben to do those really basic things expected of them. Such as our morning, afterschool, and bedtime routines, that it shouldn't have to take having baby Kait to realise they haven't grasped =(.

and

- A slow cooker!
Such one-pot wonders do help me get one thing out of the way, with Vern needing to work late more often now. After going with Kait to drive Jon and Ben back, our seemingly straightforward afterschool homework-dinner-bath-bedtime whole works is especially challenging when the boys aren't cooperative, and the baby is wailing for my attention all at the same time.

Left: Our simple turkey breast dinner on Thanksgiving Day. It was my birthday and we'd eaten out the day before. So I made this slow-cooked version (click here for the recipe), with a bit of tweaking based on the reviewers' suggestions. Works well, and especially if you don't need to roast a whole bird in the oven.

Right, and below: Vern, Kait, and I got to join Ben and his classmates and their families, too, for a nice Thanksgiving feast in school.

Thanksgiving Day was a timely reminder for me not to let these rough post-baby moments, and the boys' testing of limits, get in the way of my counting our blessings. And every extra thing we manage each day, by God's grace, is a bonus!

Thank you, old and new friends for your support, and also for reminding me that giving thanks should not be restricted to the thanksgiving season, and that we shouldn't lose sight of the stuff that really matters!

And you know, while my children are still young, I am aware that the baby years, and that precious children's innocence, do go by as fast as the changing of the seasons. Already, celebrating Jon's birthday last month -- back up one post for my belated entry, he tells me his latest ambition is to be a teen!

P.S. Me sitting here doesn't mean I'm on top of things. Far from it! Doing as much as I can, but among other things, there's clutter and more clutter, and clothes and more clothes to iron since Kait's birth that I have not got round to, and meanwhile, ironing them on an entirely needs-basis only. Where got time, not to mention the energy?! I'm neither the Energizer bunny nor Iron Man. And no kidding when I say there's a lot more mess than for what a neatnik I am NOT, I can ordinarily take =(.

But that's the only way. And blogging sparingly, though always love to keep in touch -- because it helps KEEP ME SANE!

Must love kids

Vern is away for four days.

Anyone interested to help me?

Experience not necessary, but...

MUST LOVE KIDS!!!



How do you like these "Excuse me, are you a (wannabe) model" shots, that I found it amusing when Jon and Ben gamely posed for me whilst all the camera attention was on Kait the other day? And who would have thought, will come in handy for this ad now?! Hehe!

Seriously, we'll be fine, yah, and your prayers are most appreciated! I've got the regular errands out of the way; here's what remains on my shopping 'wish' list:

- boys to be "guai-guai" and "tinghua" (well-behaved, cooperative)

- baby not to be fussing too much, and

- most of all, for this mommy to have the energy and patience to keep up with them!

Thanks, and you have a great weekend coming up!

I call her Sweetie

Above: Kaitlyn flashes Jon a big smile, two Sundays ago after her baptism, and just before Nana went off a week ago now.

Kait didn't wince when our pastor sprinkled water on her head. And as he carried her and prayed, it felt like we were taking it from the beginning again; Ben was just as little when we called this place our home away from home.

There's more to juggle now than at the outset, and with the boys growing, they do demand lots of energy and patience from us. But whether as parents to two before, or blessed with three now, may God be our guide always.

Good morning, God

This is your day

I am your child

Show me your way.

The simple lyrics of this song Ben learned from his teacher becomes a prayer for myself also, as I sing it to Kait every morning she greets me with her sweet smiles, and especially when she's had a fair amount of sleep! =)

"I want my mommy!"

Above: Ben playing mommy to Croco, his plush crocodile.

That first day I came home from the hospital, Ben plonked himself next to me
when I was nursing Kaitlyn, and let Croco "drink from him" to its heart's content!

But now, it's no laughing matter when today, Ben, with tears welling up in his eyes, said out loud what I sensed had been bothering him:

"I want to be a baby!
"I don't want to grow up!"

After Kaitlyn's arrival, Ben has pretended to be, and will in fact, act like a baby himself. Asking for me ("I want my mommy!"), making an announcement when he needs to go ("I have a poopy diaper!"), and yes, getting very easily frustrated whenever things don't seem right.

It was just last night when he noticed I'd hung Kaitlyn's (wet) face towel on a separate hanger from her bath towel, and asked, "Why is Kaitlyn so special?" (read: special enough that she gets two hangers). And I realised that my little boy was feeling it. Feeling displaced from his "baby of the family" title.

How would you assure an older child that he is no less special than the new baby?

Since he was little, Ben would go where I go, and vice versa. But now, it's as if all of a sudden, the baby's birth has catapulted him into "big brotherhood", with the unspoken expectation for him to grow up overnight.

Older brother Jon, too, had to do the same when Ben came along last time. And I know, Ben's not such a little boy anymore. But something about being sandwiched between an older brother and a younger sister, seems to add to the adjustment difficulty. Ben also thinks that "Jon thinks Kaitlyn is special". Referring, probably, to that gentle side of his Gor Gor, that's not quite the case when Ben and Jon play, because that's just how brothers and boys will play with each other.

What will you do to assure the older kids that they are still every bit special, and always will be? Any suggestions? It's not easy to carve out that one-on-one or "special" (as I like to call it) time with each of my two boys right now. I try and steal moments with them, not just be caught up with the everyday stuff.

Meanwhile, Kaitlyn is feeling better, after the saline solution and bulb syringe helped clear her stuffy nose. Thanks for backing us up, I appreciate your support and prayers!

Now to also work on that night-day mixup. As if the eat-poop round-the-clock isn't exhausting enough for any mom, night after night, I fight to keep awake with a baby who doesn't want to fall asleep in the wee hours. So yes, if Kaitlyn can know night is night, that'll really make my day!

Are we there yet?

"Is baby coming?" asks Jon.
"I want her to come now!" wishes Ben.

The home stretch is one filled with eager anticipation, but don't we all know that babies come when they want to?

And I'm trying not to overworry, or be daunted already by how much more there is to juggle in the days ahead. But to look forward to the joy of being a new parent again.

Right: Earlier this month, a cheeky Ben who likes to place his hand on my tummy to feel the lil one's movements, has concluded, "Baby is nocturnal"! Referring to how the kicks, as I know them for awhile now, take place mostly throughout the night. As if Baby is already training me for the exhausting part of being a new mother -- the non-stop nursing and poopy diaper changing! But it only gets better, and better, yeah? =)

Meanwhile, we are in the last leg of summer...

Below: A mix of old and new experiences that Jon and Ben got to enjoy this month. Also like a reminder for me of some basic things that we can afford to have more of, whether I'm doing something for the umpteenth time or approaching it brand new...

Ask, "How can I serve you?"

"Serving in God's big backyard" was the theme for our church Vacation Bible School this year. At the end of each morning, the children took back with them a simple lesson of who we can serve -- our family, friends, neighbours, and the community, besides just the church and God, honouring Him in the different facets of our lives.

There are times when housewifey and motherly duties sap me, pregnant or not, and I get all grumpy and tell the husband he should be appreciative. I forget that loving = serving, without reservations, unconditionally. And there's stuff the man of the house does that's beyond me, like ending up having to install the dishwasher DIY when our oven conked out last week (I'll spare you the long story), that I too need to appreciate him for, and make it a point to say "thank you"!

Laughter, the best medicine

Leslie and Jay of "Laughing Matters" lived it up, by injecting fun into learning, as part of the Catch the Reading Bug programme at the library.

Not just for the boys, I could use the laughter myself. It was a nice little midweek break for us when temperatures soared, and I couldn't think of anywhere else to take them without venturing too far.


Try, try again... and don't stop practising

Ben waited for the weekend to roll around when Vern could go ice-skating with him and Jon. It's only Ben's second time at the rink, but no different from that first time last year, he put his best foot forward, and picked himself up whenever he fell down.

Jon, who had taken lessons before, was more confident on the ice. Still, he knew that without practice, we get rusty at doing anything we have grasped. However, ice-skating is something we haven't managed to make time for in awhile, because of crazy enough schedules.


Interest sparks imagination
Here's something that each boy especially likes this summer. And watching each child work on it like a pet project, it's true that interest is a key ingredient in sparking anyone's imagination and creativity.

Jon, and the Stargate -- inspired by the Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis shows on Sci-Fi channel -- he put together using recyclable stuff, and couldn't wait to declare open!



Ben and his drawings and stories to tell, like for this "flip the flap" book, that's a good opportunity to encourage writing of the alphabet as well...

Day by day

From the word "Go" every day, there's nary a dull moment when it comes to kids!

OK, it depends on how you define "dull". And admittedly, some noise, like giggles and laughs, is more music to the ears, than, say, whining and crying. Or when siblings squabble (not again!), and the mommy (or daddy) has to raise her (or his) voice to be heard! =(

From breakfast to dinner, to bedtime, it takes more than food to keep the children occupied. And what works for one may not for the other. But while childcare is relentless, there are wonderful moments to savour.



Some things are more routine, and I do what I can to keep up with Ben and Jon, while keeping house. And I'm happy when they eat their fill, and ask for seconds, or thirds! Not so thrilled though, when I fish out sticky green frogs that have miraculously survived the wash and dry cycles! And is it just in our home, that clutter builds up even more relentlessly as does dust?!

But it's all in a day's work, and fun, don't you agree? You must know what I mean when I say the frustrations are as real as the joys.

And you bet I love it so, when the brothers play nicely together. And when they can sit down without leaving their seats every so often (but don't we all know children don't like to sit still?)!

Here's Jon and Ben concentrating quite hard (to my surprise!), working on their own version of the Stargate for their bedroom door, like a "wormhole" to Slumberland...

... As inspired by their daddy's favourite shows on the Sci-Fi channel -- Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis, that have at least one of the boys hooked already!

Day in, day out...
With just a month more to go to the baby's arrival, I'm not without the usual complaints of pregnant women. And because I'm not walking as briskly as I like, when the boys run ahead of me, I feel even more out of control now.

"Come out right now!", I had to yell at them at the park the other day, when they disappeared into some thick bushes, that was hard for me and my "double" size (as Ben calls me these days) to get in there (to extricate them -- if I could, I would!).

And it wasn't the first time, that one boy was trying to do a cartwheel, and the other running amok and straight into someone else's shopping cart, at the grocery store after that.

It's still summer vacation after all, and if the weather's not too hot and humid, it's nice to let the kids be outdoors to burn off some energy. And especially if the playground time can buy me, not always though, a saner grocery trip after that.


Some places, like the library, and small neighbourhood parks, work better at this point for me to take the boys on my own. But for others with sprawling grounds, like the Botanic Garden -- my alltime favourite place of interest, it only makes sense to leave to do altogether with the husband.

Seizing the day at the Botanic Garden's Whitaker Music Festival last month -- a concert in the park that capitalizes on the sun setting later in summer. And only so few times a year when picnicking is permitted on the garden's pristine grounds.



But yes, day in day out, it's not just energy that I need to run chase after the children, but loads (big loads!) of patience as well, and I have to be firmer also.

Some things, too, work better for one child than the other, because of their different personalities, and their age difference. And though we say we don't want to (overly) pamper our children by giving them too many choices, you can't not cater to each one's needs.

There are fun, learning tools like jigsaw puzzles, that Ben isn't as interested in as he is into some other things, such as the "Where is Waldo?" book we stumbled on at the library. It's his own idea to come up with drawings of Fluffy his plush penguin, and let me know what words to write down, before we put the pages together to make his very own "Where is Fluffy?" book...



The library is a great resource, the way I used to think while back home, only bookstores are. It's the one place I will go week after week with the boys. And besides the reading we do together, and books do offer ideas for creative play, the library's summer reading programme is also helping Jon spend minutes each day on "read and read".

With the hours chalked up from reading, Jon, and Ben from what I read to him, have earned little rewards like stickers, and free slushes and icecream cones. For Jon, the "write and write", and doing Math, still need a lot of prodding, but practise is needed because of the long summer hols.


Daily Lessons
Some other aspects, as the boys grow, I'm also grappling with.

Such as when one child showed a side that's more than just a case of talking back, I was quite taken aback and did what I normally would not do. Gave him three smacks on the bum, and asked him to stay in the room to think about why what he did was not acceptable to me.

After that, I asked myself though, what kind of a message was this mom sending when I had to use force (albeit it, "not (a) painful" one) to bring across my point? Or is it because we spare the rod, and have spoiled our children?

In a different setting, I don't know what gripped the other child, and midway through helping me make a cake, he decided to toss the mixer with it still plugged in, and beaters sticking up and swirling away, into the mixing bowl!

There was gooey cakemix everywhere -- not just on the mixer, but on us, on the table, floor, and wall as well! Good thing ours' just an inexpensive handheld mixer. But am I practising double standards when I didn't smack him, thinking it was more important for him to help clean up the mess he created?

No doubt parenthood has its challenges at every stage. And it comes with surprises like these, for me to know I am anything but self-sufficient. There's so much I don't know, so much to learn from other parents who've been there, done that. And also to go to our Heavenly Father who embraces us with an everlasting love, is forgiving, but at the same time does not stinge on tough love.

From our own children, I also want to see the world through their eyes -- and look at things that in my haste to get this and that task done in a day, I may otherwise miss out on.

Jon stops to catch a firefly...

...and at Ben's request, he lets go of the bug after we've taken a closer look.

And here's one of those simple Science experiments out of a library book, that had Ben and Jon fascinated for a little while...

... until the colours (from drops of food colouring) were all blended in the milk, and the show was over. But not before we've had a good laugh over something we thought up, that's not-so-pleasant-smelling (guess what?), doing the same thing in air!

One day at a time...
By day's end, I'm exhausted, and it's easy to be frustrated when at least one boy (usually it's the one who gave up napping long before he should) takes well over an hour before he will eventually fall asleep. But for all their naughty moments, and lessons for me, I try not to forget to encourage Jon and Ben at bedtime, to give thanks for the wonderful things we got to enjoy for the day.

Day by day, one day at a time, may His grace be sufficient for us. May the joy of the Lord be our strength. And that there will always be joy enough, more than enough to spread around!

Though it's easier said than done to seize the day every day, let's not have to wait for a special day to come round to count our blessings, and savour those everyday moments that I tend to take for granted.


And wouldn't it be great if we can live each day "totally" ("Totally!" is Jon's candid response, when you ask him if he wants to do something he really likes) -- as best as we can? =)

A feast for the eyes -- last weekend's fireworks celebrating this nation's Independence Day.


And a semi-homemade pizza lunch that's a delightful meal, and always extra special when I get the help of little hands!


And thank you for caring...
... and for coming here to check in on the three guys and me, and our lil one on the way. I've cut back on blogging, but will try and catch up with how you're doing, whenever I can.

Meanwhile, some flowers for you to stop and smell amidst your busy schedules...

Take care now, and God bless you and yours richly! =)