Less haste, more speed

How are you doing? Thanks for dropping me a line! Here's a long update, to make up for me going MIA for a bit longer than usual!

School resumed, that's right, a week ago, and we're back to our whir of activities! But like these pretty primrose that bloomed at the start of the year, and other times leaves you waiting and waiting, I'm trying not to be in such a hurry all the time!



I'm back to packing lunchboxes, yes, but hopefully not packing too many things to do, especially on the three days I have the mornings to myself while Ben is in school, before having to go back to pick him up first, then, Jon and Vern.



Sandwiches, wraps, or these pita pockets go down well with us adults, less so with our boys. Jon and Ben still prefer a noodle or pasta lunch, that some old tricks continue to work for us in the new year. Like using back the same ingredients as for dinner (yes, there's hardly a meal now when I'm not cooking extra portions), and if I can, throw in a little surprise element (such as our all-time fave fishballs!), other than simply swopping the carbos for a bit of variation.


Stir-fried beef is great, but tender meat tastes better microwaved for the next meal, so beef stew is a smarter choice when I want to 'kill' dinner, and lunch the next day, with one big pot...


It's easier and quicker for me to get as much grocery done, and whatever errands out of the way, than to contend with Ben's shopping cart antics, or Jon's whining. Or have to bother the husband, who himself has enough on his plate, with the run-of-the-mill chores, that again, are less challenging for me to manage alone, when both boys are in school, or in bed.

It's a different kind of stress from being a working mom, when I would be bringing work home or mulling over some uncompleted project, but not wanting to miss out on quality time with the family. Still, now, from the word "Go!", it's a long day for stay-at-home moms, and I would like to sit down more, in between keeping house, and keeping to our schedules, not to mention keeping sane also!

And because there's only that much I can do on my own, and so much later I should go to bed than them, when it's something that can be helped, that I do not have to "must get it done right away", I'm appreciating it more and more, when my three guys can help me, in whatever ways they can. And even when it means that a task will take longer to complete. For that's when I do catch my breath!

So, surely some good can come out of involving the children to help out with little things around the house, never mind that we are still just working with them to pack away their stuff (strewn all over the place) at day's end. We do it together, though more often than not, the daddy or me is still the one, not the boys, picking up the lion's share of whatever is lying around.

No, I'm not a neatnik, if you don't already know that by now, but it's nice to wake up to some semblance of order -- and not be tripping over a stumbling Lego block or more, first thing in the morning, before we start another hopefully-not-too-chaotic day!

We can certainly benefit from more routines and structure, something I'm not good at implementing or adhering to, though! What you see here, are among the saner moments in our days, when the boys aren't fighting, or when any one of our stress levels isn't going up and rubbing off on the other!



For us so far, the kitchen seems to work best as the starting point for Jon and Ben to chip in. Maybe because both boys are not over their "Iron Chef America" craze, and me three! I sure hope Bobby Flay will live up to his coveted Iron Chef status once again, having been defeated twice in a row already!

Ben breaks up the baby bok choy, and he will happily do so, if I promise him his own private "stash" to chop into smithereens afterwards (though it can be terribly messy to clean up, because of the juices from the greens)!


Like Ben who doesn't automatically clear his plate, Jon still has to be reminded to take his lunchbox and school folder out of his backpack once home. But he obliges when I ask him to dice the potatoes for this braised chicken. And he goes on to lick the bone clean, although after that, he's been saying "no thanks" to more of such requests to hone his fine (culinary?/) motor skills!


But doesn't the food always taste extra sweet, when you've had a hand in making it? Do you remember when you fried your first egg? What's your trick for measuring the amount of water for steamed rice, besides doing it by the cupfuls -- do you dip your hand, palm down, into the rice cooker, or just your finger, to see how far the water rides up?



Before school started, when we were housebound for a little bit, two friends Corinne and Ann came and hung out with us for the evening...


And the one outing we managed all break long, was to the Science Centre. The fascinating Gunther von Hages' Body Worlds 3 -- the original exhibition of real human bodies -- had made its way here, but we weren't up to it, so we caught "Human Body" instead, our first show at the Omnimax! The boys were more intrigued with the dinosaurs, it seemed, a perennial favourite with them...



Always in a hurry?

Now I wasn't scouring literature on slowing down, but every other article I've come across this past week seems to be talking about de-stressing, and sleeping better. And there was even one with a reminder to take care of ourselves, specifically ourselves -- in the course of trying to be a good mother, a good wife, a good friend, and all the other good things we try to be, sometimes more than for our own good!

Are you always in a hurry, too? Rushing from place to place, one thing to another?

Already running late for school, but when Jon seemed to be taking his own sweet time, I was really anxious, and kept asking him to "Hurry up!", "Quick!", "Get in the car!". The husband, and he's the more calm and collected of us two (and whose Type B genes Jon obviously has), was just leaning over for his cup of milk. Sipping it, like you would hot latte, except it was cold milk (!), and peering over his mug, Vern said to me matter-of-factly, "No used you getting all worked up, Jon is missing one sock.".

I thought back to a few days before that, to a different incident when I had tried my best to hurry, but could not, and the woman who couldn't wait for me to back out of the parking spot, had gestured to me frantically, spouting can't-be-anything-nice from behind her windscreen, if her facial expressions were anything to go by.

Trying to ask Jon to get going, when he was stuck, I was no different from that driver. The reason I could not reverse out of the spot sooner, was because if I had not waited, I would have rammed straight into two people walking right in my path -- one of them talking on the cellphone and oblivious to where she was heading, and the other, pushing a cart.

More haste, less speed. And conversely, it's true, too -- less haste, more speed! I'm trying to do that, and slow down some! Multitasking still works, no doubt, but I'm seeing too, that if I can help it, and I focus on one thing at a time, it may be more productive than working myself up into a frenzy, trying to do too many things at one go!

Taking five, and sitting down with Ben to work on a paper-plate hippo...


And with that, I've come to the end of this rather long, but true tale.

You have a T-rex-ffic week now! =)

"If you operate on what you believe a good mother/partner/friend would do and you leave
yourself - what you need, how you feel - out of the equation, your relationships will suffer.

"I'm here to tell you that cherishing yourself by making yourself a priority in your own life is
possible. You can take care of your needs and your relationships with family and friends
can thrive..."

- Geneen Roth in "First Things First", Good Housekeeping, Sep 07.